Given the excitement that exists around every pregnancy—the growth of a family and community when a new soul is placed on Earth—why would anyone not say “mazal tov” hearing this news? This choice of phrases signifies a delicate understanding of the uncertainty and sensitivity surrounding the pregnancy journey. In this article, we will delve into the reasons behind the use of the preferred phrase, “b’sha’ah tovah” and explore other instances of Jewish privacy in matters related to pregnancy.
B’sha’ah Tovah vs. Mazal Tov
B’sha’ah tovah,” meaning “in a good time” or literally “hour” encapsulates the idea that life’s blessings unfold according to divine timing and understanding. This phrase is employed when hearing about a pregnancy as an acknowledgment of the unique journey that pregnancy represents. Unlike other occasions where “mazal tov” is used to celebrate achievements and happy events, the decision to use “b’sha’ah tovah” reflects the Jewish perspective that pregnancy is not exactly news or a goal like other exctiing information, but the middle of a process, which can be very tenuous or even dangerous to the mother and unborn baby.
Pregnancy, with its inherent uncertainties and potential challenges, is regarded as a significant journey that encompasses both joy and trepidation. Jewish tradition acknowledges that while pregnancy is a blessing, it is a complex and delicate process that can be fraught with unknowns. Even though thankfully risks during pregnancy are at an all-time low, no amount of medical advancements have made it a perfectly easy and risk-free process. By using “b’sha’ah tovah,” the Jewish community acknowledges the unpredictability of the journey and expresses the hope that the timing will be auspicious and favorable, and reserving “mazal tov” for after the birth.
Privacy and Cultural Sensitivity: Jewish customs extend to various aspects of pregnancy, prioritizing privacy and sensitivity:
- Baby Showers: Traditionally, Jewish couples opt to forego traditional baby showers, which are common in many cultures. Not only does this invite a great deal of attention for the parents, again, the Jewish approach has always been to reserve celebration until all is said and done with the birth. This would apply to any other modern customs like gender reveal parties and so on.
- Baby Furniture: While definitely less common, couples may delay purchasing baby furniture until later in the pregnancy or even arrange with a store to only pick things up after. This practice, rooted in humility and awareness of life’s uncertainties, stems from the understanding that it would be even more tragic if, God forbid, something goes wrong. Of course, it also takes pressure off of new parents who definitely can get away with only a small bassinet and changing mat for the first 6 months anyway.
- Naming Ceremonies: Jewish tradition places great significance on the act of naming. The naming ceremony takes place on the eighth day for boys (brit milah) or often the first Shabbat for girls. This waiting period acknowledges the sanctity of life and the importance of taking time for thoughtful decisions.
The choice to say “b’sha’ah tovah” instead of “mazal tov” upon hearing about a pregnancy exemplifies the deep-rooted sensitivity and understanding that Jewish tradition carries towards life’s cycles, especially the intricate path of pregnancy. This custom underlines the Jewish perspective that blessings should come at the right time, reflecting the uncertainties inherent in this journey, but the excitement for the journey’s conclusion, and a new one’s start.
